1. You say things like, “What are you growing for the bees this year?”
2. You don’t know if your dryer still works.
3. You’ve ever asked your neighbor for a plastic shopping bag because you don’t have any.
4. When someone says cereal, you think they mean granola.
5. You know where your eggs came from.
6. You own Crocs that aren’t just for the garden.
7. You don’t call them storm supplies, they’re for “prepping”.
8. You grow medicine.
9. The only thing you buy that comes in a box is baking soda.
10. You can’t name the Kardashians but you can name the Three Sisters.
11. You’ve never shopped for home decor because you make it- better than Martha.
12. You have a “dumb” phone.
13. You know everyone at the farmer’s market.
14. You can’t share your recipes because your neighbors don’t know where to get the ingredients.
15. The reason they can’t get the aforementioned whole food ingredients is because you don’t shop at the “regular” supermarket.
16. Not a single person or animal in your presence has a name that isn’t symbolic.
17. You know at least one person who makes their own wine or beer.
18. You both own and season cast iron skillets that AREN’T for camping.
20. You realize and comment on the “scents” that other people wear…and it’s usually just their “shampoo” or “lotion”.
21. You think public schooling doesn’t teach children “life skills”.
22. You know hand-stitching techniques. And knitting. And machine sewing. Crotchet. Felting. Is there a craft you don’t know?
23. You’ve ever received a rabbit, goat, pig, cow, or chicken for a holiday or birthday.
24. You own more tools than a construction company.
25. You make all of your holiday gifts.
26. You harvest natural yeast.
27. Your children have 5 categories of toys: Outside, animals, housework, yardwork, and books.
28. You know the dangers of sunscreen.
29. You make your own laundry soap.
30. You’ve ever uttered, “That isn’t actually food…”
31. You’ve sourced organic clothing companies.
32. You go out in public in an apron.
33. You only put on jewelry when you have a date because it “catches on everything”.
34. You’ve ever made soap, lotion, or cosmetics.
35. You know more about growing food than sports.
36. Someone in your family shot something and it resides in their or your freezer.
37. Fire building is an art.
38. You know basic veterinary medicine.
39. You read about food. Not cookbooks. But…Pollan. Campbell. Esselstyn.
41. You’ve never been to a gym but you’re jacked.
42. Waste. Free. Lunches.
43. Monsanto is a swear.
44. You know at least one person who has caught a baby. Or had one in their livingroom.
45. You follow at least one sensationalist tv or radio show about corrupt government.
46. You wildcraft.
47. You measure things by cords, bushels and pecks.
48. You use your barn for something other than storage.
49. You have a pantry and its full of “dry goods” and “home canned goods”.
50. When cows are laying down in the field, you know to bring an umbrella.